How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You Leil Lowndes (nonfiction book recommendations .TXT) 📖

"Nice presentation" could be a real disappointment if she thought she'd made taerrific presentation.

Have the First Laugh

To a comedian, your face is just one of many bobbing around in the sea facing him in the club. As he delivers each punch line, you suspect he's unaware of who starts the trickle, or the riptide, of laughter.

Not so! As a speaker, I guarantee you that every one of my colleagues knows precisely who inaugurated the laughter, precisely how long after the punchline was delivered, and precisely how enthusiastically they laughed.

Huntresses, so it is with most men, even if they're just telling a joke to a few friends.

TECHNIQUE #43

HUNTRESSES): HAVE THE FIRST LAUGH

Huntresses, it is with embarrassment that I offer you this obvious technique, but leaving it out would be a grave sin of omission.

Be the first to laugh at his jokes, and laugh the longest. Many a Huntress who had the first laugh when her

Quarry made a joke has had the last as she waltzed off to the altar with him.

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Lovers Give Each Other Pet Names

By now you are ready for another tender trap to create intimacy with your Quarry and make him or her feel like the center of the universe.

Many of us, when we were kids, had nicknames. Lots of today's Roberts were once called Bobby. Many Elizabeths were once little Betsy. Many Johns were Johnny, and Sues were Suzie. Did you

have a kid name? I did. My mother and all the other kids called me "ll eilie." That remained my official designation until I decided it wasn't respectable-sounding enough for the young professional I aspired to be. So, along with my intended personality change, came a name change. I insisted everyone call me Leil.

I have one friend from my childhood days, Rick, who resisted the change and to this day calls me Leilie.

Whenever I hear a voice on the phone asking to speak to Leilie, my heart thumps with childhood memories. The emotions that I feel upon hearinLgeilieget transferred to Rick, and I'm sure the fact that Rick (I call him Ricky) calls me Leilie is one factor in our friendship lasting so long.

Childhood experiences and childhood names have a strong subliminal effect. Like any weapon, however, this one could backfire. If your Quarry had an unhappy childhood, hearing

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an old nickname might invoke horrible memories. If Walter's parents were always dumping on him, your calling him Wally could drive him up the wall. If Elizabeth was a battered child, just the name Lizzie could make her go bonkers. Test market the pet name on your Quarry first.

However, if your Quarry had a happy childhood, using a pet name deepens intimacy, and it shoots a little through his or her veins every time you say that name. PEA

TECHNIQUE #44:

CONFER PET-NAME STATUS

If it's appropriate, ask your Quarry what he or she was called as a kid. If you sense that your Quarry likes that pet name, say, "Oh, I love it! Do you mind if I call you that?"

When Your Quarry Praises You

One day I was browsing in a bookstore for a book on compliments. Nowhere to be found! But there was a big fat one of several thousand insults, "for all occasions" it proclaimed. It was full of supposedly hilarious insults like, "Hey, you're so ugly you have to have your x-rays retouched," or guaranteed lines like, "You look much better without my glasses." Guaranteed, yes, to get you a cheap laugh, but not to make someone fall in love with you.

Many of us, even if we would never dream of delivering a hackneyed line like that, still inadvertently insult our Quarry when he or she compliments us. Americans are beastly at giving compliments—and receiving them. It's a national characteristic. They simply stammer a weak thank-you. Worse, they say, "Oh, it was just luck."

This lukewarm reaction does nothing to make your Quarry feel good for complimenting you.

Furthermore, if you mum-

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ble "Not really" or attribute your success to "luck,"

you are indirectly insulting your Quarry's powers of perception. After getting no positive feedback, your Quarry will quit complimenting you.

Whenever your Quarry praises you, don't just say,

"Oh, shucks," or even, as Amy Vanderbilt suggests,

"Thank you." Go Amy one step better. Reflect the sunshine of the compliment right back on the giver.

Quickly murmur, "That's very kind of you," or "How sweet of you to notice.'' The French do it regularly.

Instead of sayingmerci(thank you), the gracious ones murmur ' C'est gentil " (loosely translated, "That's kind of you").

If someone hurls a boomerang, it does an almost 180-degree turn and comes right back at the thrower. I call the technique of reflecting the compliment bacBkoomeranging . Here are some

examples of boomeranging: How's your family? "Oh, they're greaTt.hanks for asking ." How was your vacation? "Thanks, you remembered ! [Show you are obviously impressed that they did.] Yeah, I really had a great time." Gee, I like your new hairstyle.O"h, thanks for noticing . Yes, I found a great new hairdresser."

TECHNIQUE #45:

BOOMERANGING

When your Quarry compliments you or asks you about anything you enjoy talking about, boomerang the good feelings back.

Thank him or her for asking or noticing. Stamp out childish embarrassment and let your big smile show your Quarry you appreciated the compliment.

When you boomerang , your Quarry will feel good for having praised you. Human animals, ever in pursuit of good feelings, will conjure up some more good thoughts about you to make themselves feel good. The more good thoughts your Quarry has about you, the mo re twigs it puts on the fire of love.

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"I Love the Way You Wrinkle Your Nose When You Laugh"

This final ego-massage technique concerns long-term love. It helps keeypouin love with your Quarry because it keeps your Quarry doing the things you love. Love is a two-way street, and it's hard to keep someone high on you if your affection for them sags.

Dr. Benjamin Spock is the famous baby doctor who in the 1950s taught American