Color Us Crazy by brea isomee (the chimp paradox .txt) 📖

i couldn't allow myself to do it . The look of remorse that was plastered on him face was screaming for me to calm down , but deep down in side a fire still burned there . Although i dropped my arm back down to my side , i still wanted to fuck him up .

" son , " he dropped his head " i'm so so sorry ."

I was really about to tear into his ass good in the middle of the hospital floor . But then i saw Marcus , and i wanted to jump on him . What the fuck ? Was it piss off Rodney day or some shit ?! Marcus hadn't been home in . . . . a few days , so why was he even at the hospital ? He didn't give a fuck about our mother , and if he did then he had a funny way of showing it .

Raven ran to Marcus who was standing a few feet behind my father " Marcus ! Marcus !" She screamed .

With a smug smile , Marcus picked Raven up and spun her around .

I couldn't take it anymore .

I just wanted to see my mother and then get the hell out of there .

I walked back up to the desk with Alexis behind me . " excuse me , i'm here to see Martina Halt . "

The nurse looked at me and sighed " didn't i tell you to wait ?"

" bitch -"

Alexis grabbed me and moved me behind her " excuse me , but , we're in kind of a hurry and we need to make sure she's okay , so can you please do me this favor ?" Alexis gave her the sweetest smile .

She can be ghetto when she wants to be , i know it , but she's never shown that side around me . All i'd seen so far was the sweet and shy side and i can't say i really minded .

The nurse rolled her eyes but started typing on her keyboard .

" room 320 , second floor ."

" thank you miss ."

I smiled , maybe having Alexis as a friend wouldn't be so bad .

When we finally got to the second floor i was damn near speed walking and knocking people over trying to get to the right room . Believe me , wheelchairs were being tipped over and bed's were getting pushed out the way . I heard Alexis telling me to calm down but , i couldn't , really . If your mom was laid in the hospital , i believe some of you would have done the same thing .

" mom ?" I peeped into room 320 .

My mom was sitting up in the bed laughing at the Comedy Central channel .

When she heard my voice she sighed and muted the tv " yes son ?"
I entered the room , holding the door open for Alexis " you okay ?"

" well , " she looked at me " i'm just fine . "

" how can you say that when - "

" when what ?! Look , i said i'm fine and that means i'm damn fine . Don't try to find a hidden meaning behind my words because there isn't one ."

" But dad -"

" Rodney , shut up ! He didn't do a damn thing ! So , get it out of your head . Your father is a good man . He's always there for us and - and . . . . he pays the bills . You don't find too many men like that anymore ."

I twisted up my face , fighting with myself to not scream " is that what the fuck this about ? Money ? If it's about money i'll get you money ! I'll support you mama . But , daddy did this . I know it and you do too . Raven fucking seen the shit ! Don't tell me you're okay and that nothing happened because i know you're fucking lying ."

My mother just shook her head .And right when she was about to speak she finally realised Alexis standing next to me " and what is that tramp doing here ? You got other people all in my business ? You know what , you're just like your father , stupid ."

I gave a bitter laugh " you know what ? You're not the same woman who gave birth to me and who used to hug and kiss me when i'd fall down the steps or when i had a nightmare . You're . . . different . Your not my mother ."

" get the fuck out !" She screamed at the top of her lungs .

I turned to the door but before i left i looked over my shoulder at my mother . She looked the same , but something inside of her had changed . The woman i'd known would have killed my father if he ever put his hands on her . She just looked so weak and so fragile like at any moment she break in half . I kept thinking over and over that maybe she'd already broken .

" your right about something , " i said only loud enough for us to hear " i am like my father , but i'm not him ."

With that i walked smoothly from the room .

How dare she sit up there and not only lie to me but call me stupid . What was getting into her ? It was like , something had corrupted her , taking away her happy spirit and replacing it with something so unpleasant and so unhappy .

She just , wasn't the same .

My family was changing day by day but , no matter how much they change i'll always love them .

I had to do something though .

Trinity kept popping into my mind . I needed to go see her .

I left Raven with Marcus and asked Alexis to give me a ride to Trinity's .

When we pulled up outside of her apartment building , i looked over to Alexis " don't worry about what my mother said ."

She smiled " i won't ."

" Friends ?" I asked her .

" yeah , friends ."

_____________________________________

-Trinity -

I wrapped a towel around my body . That shower had to be one of the hottest i'd ever taken . But i needed it . I felt so dirty before , even though it was all in my head . I had to convince myself that i was fine and that what Devon tried to do to me wasn't my fault . That , took a long time to do . But , after a while , i was back to normal .

I coated my whole body with Cocoa butter and rubbed it in . Then i put on a pair of pajama shorts and an over sized t-shirt .

I was about to collapse onto my bed but then i saw the carving of me and Devon's name over my bed , then i remembered the way Devon used to hold me in that very bed . I thought i was going to be sick to my stomach .

No , i couldn't sleep there .

I grabbed a blanket from the hallway closet and laid down on the couch , wrapping myself up .

Right when i was about to fall asleep , there was a knock on the front door .

I was thinking my mother was going to get it but then i remembered she'd left earlier in the day for a photo-shoot . Yes , my mother is a model .

I opened the door and was shocked to see Rodney .

" Rodney , it's 10 - "

He cut off my sentence with his lips crashing into mines . The kiss was so filled with passion and need i didn't know what to do . I'd never experienced anything like it . He backed me into the living room and we dropped onto the the couch with his body on top of mines . He kept the kiss going too . My mouth working with his was setting my body in motion .

Rodney ran his hand up and down the inside of my thighs , making sure to grope every section .

Without warning his tongue entered my mouth .

He was working my body expertly and we weren't even having sex . His tongue played along with mines , rubbing against mines . He was exploring my mouth causing me to moan out in pleasure .

I couldn't help but wonder what the hell i was doing ? I was ready ! I wanted to do it with him , there is nothing wrong with that .

He put his hand under my back and slide it down until it was down my shorts , with a firm grip on my butt .

Without moving his hand , he pulled back to study my face " Trinty . Babe . " he pecked my lips and whispered " i need you ."

-Trinity-

" i , um , Rodney . . . "

He cute me off , kissing me again , making my mind spin even more out of control .

" Trinity , baby , i want to show you how i can really make you feel . And not only that , but i need this . Just let me ."

I shook my head .

I mean , it's not like i didn't want it . Not only was my body screaming for him , but i just needed to be so much more closer to him . I knew that we wouldn't just be a one night stand , but it doesn't hurt to ask , right ?

" Rodney , before we do anything , i need to know . . . . what am i to you ?"

Rodney stared into my eyes and i could feel the way he felt instantly . Love was pouring from him to me .

" babe , " he brushed the back of his hand across my cheek " Trinity , i love you . I might not be the best boyfriend , but i promise you that you're my one and only . I need us to work . I wouldn't have us any other way . So , can i show you how passionate i am about you ?"

Without waisting another moment , i shook my head yes , and he went to work .

-Trinity-

I woke up the next morning beyond sore . Although Rodney took his time with me , he still couldn't take away the pain that i was now feeling .

It was beginning to feel like i had been split in half the night before when in reality it was so romantic and so beautiful . Rodney was more than i could have asked him to be . He stopped almost every five seconds to ask if i was okay . What guy do you know that would do that