The Experiment by Cassidy Shay (i can read with my eyes shut .txt) 📖

I wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of Belle crying. I change her pants and feed her, then sit in the rocking chair so that the soft motion will pull her into sleep. A prayer comes back to me from when I was a little girl. My dad used to come in with me every night and pray with me. Religion wasn’t very important to our family, but it was something that he did every night anyway. “Now I lay me down to sleep,” I say softly to her. “I pray the Lord my soul to keep. And if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. Hold me in your arms and keep me safe from harm.” I pray softly, but Mathew still wakes up from the sound. He sits up in bed and just watched me as I repeat the prayer over and over again.
The sound of my voice and the gentle rocking motion cause Belle to fall asleep quickly. Even after I feel her breath become regular and her eyes stay closed, I don’t move. I keep humming to her as Mathew watches.
After several minutes, I feel my eyelids turn to lead. I stand up slowly and carry her to the crib. I make sure that she won’t be suffocated by anything in there, and then go back over to my bed.
I climb in and Mathew wraps me in his arms. “I didn’t know that you could love a human being so much after only knowing them for a couple days,” I tell him. “I’ve only known her a little while, and I would rather die than see her be hurt.”
He doesn’t say anything, only draws me closer. I rest my head against him and think about how much my life has changed in the past few months, how much it’s going to change in the future.
I let out an exhausted sigh as I drift back to sleep.
I wake up several days later to see Mathew rocking the baby. I don’t know how he got up without waking me, but I don’t waste any time asking questions. He has a terrified look on his face.
Belle has a pacifier in her mouth, but I can tell she won’t be satisfied by it for very much longer. I know that she needs to be fed. I jump out of bed and take her from him, then watch as he gets ready for work. “Why didn’t you wake me up?” I ask.
“You need your sleep. And it’s really not that big of a deal. I just heard her crying, changed her diaper, and started rocking her. But then she started getting fussy… I got nervous.” He lets out a short laugh. “I also just wanted to spend time with her. I know I’m not her father, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be her daddy.”
He finishes getting ready, gives me a hug, and then walks out the door. After Belle is done eating, I change her, and then lay her down on a blanket on the floor.
I get her a toy and watch her play. After a few minutes, I start talking to her. I talk about Mathew, Sarah, Julie, and Dr. Pender first, because she will grow up to know all of them. Then I start talking about Jack, Macy, and everyone who she won’t ever get to meet. After I get done talking about that, I start to describe some Memories to her. “They had wonderful rides. Roller coasters, ferris wheels, and all sorts of rides. And then they had food that you only bought because you were at a carnival. Corn dogs, nachos, funnel cakes, and so much more.”
The sound of a knock makes me stop. I roll away from Belle a little bit, and then stand up. When I open the door, I see Sarah and someone else that I’ve never seen before. Judging by the way that she’s looking at him, he’s the boy she told Julie and I about.
“Hi,” I say. “Sarah, who is this?”
“This is Max,” she says, and then leads him inside. “Max, this is Meagan. And you’ll meet Mathew for dinner.” Who does she think she is?

“Sarah, can I talk to you?” I ask. I drag her over to the table. “Who told you that you could bring him over for dinner? What am I supposed to do? I don’t have any food, and I’ve never cooked for more than one person before. Why didn’t you ask me first?”
A shocked expression took control of her face. “Mathew said that you wanted to have us over for dinner tonight so that you can meet him.” I shake my head as a small smile sneaks onto my face.
“I did say that. For whatever reason, he must have decided that it would be funny to invite you over tonight, without warning me.” I put my arm around her and give her a half hug. “You guys can stay. I’ll just have to have a little talk with him after you guys are gone.”
She laughs a little, but hugs me back. We look over at Max and Belle, and I smile. He’s on his stomach, talking to her softly. Her tiny hands are each wrapped around one of his fingers, and he has every bit of her attention.
“He’s so good with her,” she says. I just nod. After a couple more seconds, Max looks up and blushes.
“She reminds me of my little sister,” he says. “She was only six months old with I had to leave. But we would always lay on the floor and I would just talk to her.” He smiles, remembering a time when things were simple. “What’s with her eyes, though? I’ve never seen anything like that.”
Before I can answer, Mathew walks in the door. “Hey, guys,” he says. He comes over and gives me a quick peck on the cheek, and gives Sarah a hug. Max stands up and extends his hand.
“Nice to meet you, Mathew,” he said. They started talking about what Max does, how old he is, and then they moved on to other guy stuff. I looked at Sarah and asked if she would help make dinner for everyone.
“I don’t have much food here right now, because they haven’t restocked my kitchen for over a week. So I can make…” I look in the cupboards and the fridge, and I come up almost empty. “I can make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.”
“I haven’t had one of those since I was a little girl,” she says. “The Academy doesn’t ever make them. I don’t know why. They’re a whole lot better than the stuff that they serve down on the lower floors.” She looks at me and smiles. “You get all the good food. I’m coming over here more often.”
As the boys watch Belle and talk, we make the sandwiches. “I know it’s a lot,” I say. We used the whole loaf of bread, and it made six sandwiches. “But you guys can take the extras with you for a midnight snack or something.”
They stayed for a couple hours, and when they finally left, I collapsed on the bed. “I didn’t realize how exhausting teenagers are,” I say. He just laughs. “What?”
“You’re sixteen, right?” I smile and nod.
“I know that I’m a teenager. But I don’t feel like one. Mathew, having a baby makes you have to grow up. So even though I’m sixteen, I’m really like… 57.” We both laugh, and he comes over to hold me.
“You certainly don’t look like you’re that old,” he says into my hair. Belle is on the floor playing with a toy. We watch her in silence for several minutes.
“She really is a beautiful baby,” he says. “But she doesn’t look like you at all. Or Collin.”
“That’s what I used to look like,” I tell him. The hair, nose, eyelashes, everything. Everything except the color of her eyes.”
He’s quiet, and I wonder what he’s thinking. Finally, he tells me. “Do you think she’s an Azulate? She doesn’t have the birthmark. Or the blue eyes. But… maybe you created a new species of subspecies or whatever.” I look at his face and find that he’s frowning. “But I guess we won’t know until she’s older.”

Months go by, and Belle grows teeth. She eats more and more real food and less of the breast milk. She learns to crawl, and then to stand. She’s curious about everything, and she loves anyone who has a nice smile.
Years pass, and now she’s running around. She’s independent and won’t take no for an answer. She and Aron are good friends, and they help each other learn.
Belle is three years old now. I’m nineteen, and Mathew is twenty. We are a happy little family, no sadness or disaster to bring us down.
I haven’t thought of Collin in months.
“Au’ty!” I hear. I have the door to my room open, so that any visitors feel more welcome. I hear tiny footsteps in the hall, and then I see Aron in the doorway. His tiny, crooked teeth make his smile even more adorable than it used to be.
I hold out my arms, and he runs to me. “How are you today, Aron?” I ask him.
Instead of answering me, he looks around. “Where Belle?”
“She’s with her daddy.” Mathew has the day off, so he took Belle with him to see all of his friends. Although they like to act tough, they melt the moment that Belle is in the same room as them.
Julie came in, a smile on her face. “You’re not going